Who am I?
It's funny, as you're "growing up" you find yourself constantly asking "Who am I?" "What do I want to be when I grow up?" "What path do I take?" "Do I want to get married?" "Kids?" I never really asked myself these questions. I did everything you are expected to do. I knew who I was. I was a good student. I became a good wife. I knew I wanted to be a teacher and that's exactly what I did. Step by step I followed my path and I knew who I was. At 25, I had Tyler. I was now a mom. I still worked as a teacher; "Mom" just became a part of who I was. At 28 I had Olivia. I gave up my "work" identity and decided to be a stay-at-home mom. I've been home for over a year now and I find myself asking "Who am I?" These babies are slipping through my fingers. They will go off to school and then, who am I? A lot of my friends don't have kids. Those that do have kids, also work outside the home. I compare myself constantly. I'm an identical twin for God's sake! My life has been an eternal comparison. I know there have to be other moms that feel this way. There have to be other moms that have slowly lost who they thought they were and wonder what they will become when they dont have a million little hands trying to crawl up their leg. Although life is short, I always feel there is time. There is time to soak up the craziness that is being a stay-at-home mom. There is time to re-invent yourself. One day I will publish my books. One day I may decide to study more. One day I may find a passion that I never knew I had. There is time to make a whole new version of me. All of it--one day. But today, today I am "mama". Today I am "kiki". Today my babies and nephew see me as a magical superhero that understands even the craziest of babbles. I'll accept that identity today because who knows who I'll be tomorrow 😉